from Google.com
When my children are 10-12 months old, I start teaching them a little sign language. Since their vocal abilities do not develop as quickly as their desire to express themselves, it becomes a win-win situation. The signs that have been the most universal for my children have been “please, thank you, milk, water, juice, apple and banana,” since these are what they ask for nearly every day. It makes it so much easier when I can know – first, that they want something (please) & second, what it is that they want (milk). [It also helps to teach them young to be polite (thank you).] This is something that has saved EVERYONE so much frustration.
Anyway, my youngest, “Nana,” was no exception. She absolutely loved being able to let people know what she wanted. (I didn’t know at the time that she had quite so much to say, but I digress.) She loved that she could make a movement or two and the people she loved and who loved her knew what she wanted and would help her. Then came a dilemma.
One day she wanted something to which she didn’t know the sign. She knew what she wanted. She knew that the people around her would most likely give her what she wanted if they knew what she wanted. And she knew she could “tell” them if she had a sign they understood. BUT she didn’t know the right sign.
She wanted us to turn on the stereo and play music so she could dance.
Did not knowing the right sign stop her? No.
She made one up. She wiggled her upper body, while holding up her hands, rubbing her fingers together like she was snapping them. Brilliant! We caught on right away, and her need was soon met. She had a need and she found a way for that need to be filled.
So often, we have needs that aren’t being met, and even more often, I think, we expect others to fill those needs. We blame others for not filling these needs. We wallow in victimville because “No One Is Filling My Needs.”
I am there with you, sister. I know what you are feeling. Of all we do, after all we serve, why can’t anyone see that we have needs, too?
But then I look at my one year old (now 2 yr old). She didn’t wallow. She didn’t blame. She didn’t even stay frustrated for long. She saw she had a need. She knew of a way to fill that need, but the ‘how’ was unclear. So she made it happen anyway – her own way.
Sometimes I think that is what I need most. To care enough about myself to make sure that my needs are met. If there isn’t a known possible way – then I make one. If I need to improve my health, I figure out how to work in exercise and more healthful foods. If I need my children to stop yelling & talk nicer, I need to speak sweetly to them. If I need time to myself or out with friends, I can’t wait for someone to offer. I need to set up the time. If I need a support system for a project, it is up to me to either find one or make one.
Oft times I need to Create the Change I Need. Can you imagine what the world would be like if more of us thought and acted like my sweet baby? Wow!
Be the change you want to see in the world.
– Mahatma Gandhi
Sunshine along the Way 